How Drug Addiction Impacts Relationships

Drug addiction is not a solo act. Yes, of course, it very much shapes the person in the throes of substance abuse. But the effect it has on the people around them can be significant, too. One thing is certain. No relationship has ever experienced a positive impact from drug addiction. By definition, if Substance Abuse Disorder is involved, the relationship is dysfunctional.

 Needless to say, all kinds of relationships are damaged when at least one person is drug addicted.  However, for the purposes of this post, the focus will be on romantic connections. How does drug addiction change the dynamic between partners?

How Drug Addiction Impacts Relationships

The Emotional Toll 

This entry could fill several books but often manifests in two general ways. Both of them add to the dysfunction in major ways:

• Fixing: Sometimes, the non-addicted partner takes it upon themselves to “fix” the issue. This often takes the form of enabling. The addicted partner is covered for and has excuses made for them. The enabling partner blames themselves and goes to extremes to hide the severity of the problem.
• Fighting: In other cases, the non-addicted partner resents being caught up in the web of lies, deceit, guilt, and shame. The default setting is conflict and can bring the relationship to the brink of collapse.

Lost Trust 

Someone addicted to drugs makes promises they will not keep. In short order, this erodes the crucial trust that every couple needs. If one partner is an enabler, they may deny the deception going on but this never serves them for the better. More likely, the non-addicted partner loses respect after being lied to so frequently. 

Financial Problems

A drug addiction extracts an ever-increasing monetary cost. As the pull of the substance increases, the addicted partner may get more desperate when it comes to financing their need. This means everything from joint bank accounts to credit cards is vulnerable. It could also mean resorting to criminal acts. 

Sex Life

Many drugs have a deleterious effect on one’s sex drive and libido — especially in men. Obviously, this can dramatically shift any relationship. On the other hand, for addicts still able to perform, there is a much higher risk of infidelity. This usually happens because: 

• Drugs create an altered state of mind in which any behavior seems feasible and acceptable.
• The addicted partner feels more attracted to those who are also using.

Infidelity, of course, can create damage that is beyond repair.

Threats, Violent, and Abuse

The highest risk lies in the non-addicted partner facing risk from someone in the altered state of mind mentioned above. The insatiable desire to get high can result in anyone going to dangerous, volatile extremes. Conversely, the addicted partner can end up being the target of domestic abuse as retribution for their drug use. Either way, this can kind of violence can be the worst of the direct impacts either partner faces.

Shame and Isolation

The action of the partner using drugs can lead to the couple losing friends, family, jobs, and more. Outsiders may fear any interactions with them — leaving both partners isolated by shame. This potential reality can, in turn, activate and exacerbate any of the impacts listed above.

Getting Help on Parallel Tracks

To say the need for help is urgent is putting it mildly. First and foremost, the addiction must be addressed by qualified professionals. Running parallel to this need, the relationship desperately requires repair. This may be a tall order but it absolutely can be resolved. Taking that first step of asking for support can set in motion the processes that can serve both purposes. Let’s talk ASAP.