Dads Struggle, Too! Understanding Postpartum Depression in Men

It’s logical to associate postpartum depression with women. After all, they’re the ones carrying the baby, juggling the hormone shifts, and dealing with childbirth. However, as many as 25 percent of new fathers experience postpartum depression symptoms and at least 10 percent have a full-fledged depressive episode. Ususally this happens three to six months after their child is born.

When you give this concept the focus it deserves, you may quickly wonder why the numbers aren’t higher. Sure, women do the bulk of the work but that doesn’t change the fact that Dads have their lives thrown into chaos, too. But what’s really behind this most ignored reality?

Common Causes of Postpartum Depression in Men

1. Hormones

Yes, hormones. A drop in testosterone is common with new fathers after their child is born. This can facilitate palpable mood changes. On top of that, if a new mother is depressed, it increases the likelihood that the baby’s father will also experience some level of postpartum depression. 

2. Family History

If the father or someone in his family has struggled with depression, the risk of postpartum depression is higher. 

3. In-House Changes

The birth of a baby results in some very dramatic changes in everyone’s life. A father can be at risk for depression for reasons like:

• No longer being the primary focus of the baby’s mother
• Babies bond more quickly and intensely with their mother
• New baby = sleep deprivation 
• New pressures related to housework, finances, etc. 

What Are Some of the Signs of Paternal Depression?

Signs of depression can be consistent for both sexes but men are less likely to talk about it. Here are some paternal red flags to watch for during the first year of the new child’s life:

• Being less motivated and working less
• Working more hours to distract oneself from all that’s going on at home
• Anxiety
• Lack of concentration
• Fatigue and low energy
• Social withdrawal (including from the mother and baby)
• Unexplained physical symptoms like headaches, muscle aches, digestion disturbances
• Anger, aggression, easily frustrated, short temper, and irritability
• Sleep problems 
• Losing interest in activities that once excited you
• Self-medicating, risky behaviors, and substance abuse
• Self-harm
• Suicidal ideation 

Other Possible Paternal Postpartum Depression Risk Factors

• Financial stress
• Lack of support from his parents
• Not getting along with in-laws
• Relationship strife 
• High-stress career 
• Not living with the mother and baby

How is Postpartum Depression in Men Diagnosed?

This is tricky because men are generally reluctant to report symptoms. Conversely, some version of the “baby blues” is to be expected for both parents. An experienced mental health professional is needed to parse out the myriad factors at play. 

The sooner a diagnosis can be discerned, the better it is for mother, father, and child. If signs and symptoms arise and last more than two or three weeks, it warrants your full attention. Asking for the support you need and deserve is a sign of strength that will benefit everyone involved.

Treatment and Self-Help 

Therapy is a giant step towards managing symptoms and moving toward recovery. In the meantime, self-help steps can be a huge component of healing. As chaotic as life may feel, you’ll want to maintain as regular a sleeping routine as you can. Also:

• Make healthy eating and drinking choices
• Partake in some physical activity and exercise every day
• Cultivate some relaxation techniques
• Resist the urge to self-isolate
• Find a support group — online or in-person

It all begins with a depressed Dad breaking the stigma and asking for help. If any of the above sounds familiar, I invite you to reach out. Let’s schedule you for a free and confidential consultation to find out what’s happening in your life.