4 Tips to Reduce and Manage Anger
There are some human emotions that have earned quite a bad reputation. These include fear, shame, and anxiety. Anger, however, might be at the top of the list. As far as I know, no one is signing up for joy management but anger management? Yeah, it’s a thing and it’s...
Not Connecting? Might Be Your Attachment Style
Is it true that some people are just “lucky in love”? Could it be that there are folks who aren’t meant to have a healthy relationship? Short answer: No. More likely, there are some very important underlying factors to consider. Early childhood experiences with...
Change Your Mindset, Not Your Location
Have you ever had an emotional or personal problem that makes you feel “stuck”? Often, in such a scenario, you may be tempted to look for a geographic or circumstantial solution. There is a certain logic to this mindset. You feel trapped by your circumstances. So, you...
Why Are These Memories Coming Up Now?
It is a common reaction to trauma to enter a dissociative state where we disconnect from our experience as a way to protect ourselves from emotional and physical pain. In this state, memories of our experience can get pushed to the periphery of our conscious...
Anxiety: When Walls Of Protection Become A Prison
Anxiety is a treacherous companion. It is a master at spinning a yarn from the smallest of threads. It tells us stories designed to frighten us in the name of “protecting” us. If we believe such stories, we may start building walls of protection for ourselves. When...
Self and Other: Why Setting Expectations Is So Important
What does the word “expectations” mean to you? It typically conjures up images of measuring what may be coming your way (and hopefully not something that you’ve been lowering too often). Expectations are important but, there is another angle from which to ponder this...
Procrastination: Understand and Overcome with Time to Spare
Why do you procrastinate? No need to rush to answer.... it's a blog on procrastinating after all. Most of us do from time to time... or all the time. Unfortunately I did getting this blog written. Understanding why you do will help you develop strategies to reduce...
Finding Calm in Chaos: Self-Care When You’ve Hit The Wall
The last year has been a relentless stacking of stressor upon stressor. The pandemic, the loss of family and community members, new school/childcare challenges, remote work, isolation, political conflict and upheaval are just a few of them. Here are a few things you...
Be SMARTER about your goals….
One regret I have is not being consistent about setting and monitoring progress for personal and professional goals earlier in my life. A few years ago, I came across the Full Focus Planner, a goal setting/day planner system, and it changed the way I thought about...
When the Circus Comes to Town: Managing Late Night Anxiety
When the din of the day has died, the circus within arises – late night anxiety. The worries and concerns that were waiting in the back of your mind occupy the center ring, hindering your sleep. What can you do about it? Here are 10 long-term strategies to calm...
What can I expect to do in therapy?
Now that you’ve decided to reach out for help, you might have extra questions about the therapy experience. What will it be like? How long it last? How do they handle billing? These are all things that you will want to discuss with whomever you are looking to work...
How to Find a Therapist
Ok, so you’ve finally decided enough is enough. Or maybe someone in your life said it and you finally agreed. You are going to find a therapist to get some help with what you have not been able to conquer on your own. This is a great first step as many...
Covidepression: Been There, Done That, Now What?
You’re feeling down or worried. Then worried and a little down and every combination in between. You’re not alone. Maybe my sample is a little skewed, but I have not personally or professionally come across anyone yet who has been “knockin’ it out of the park” during...
Quiet the Critic in Your Head: Step Three – Strengthening the Positive Voice
In part one of this series we looked at how to identify your inner critic’s pattern and covered the rational rebuttal process in part two to counter the voice of your inner critic. In this part we’ll cover how to strengthen your positive voice and take a more...
3 Steps to Quiet the Critic in Your Head: Step Two – “R n R”
In part one of this series we looked at how to identify the thinking pattern that your inner critic uses. Recognizing and acknowledging which pattern(s) your critic uses allows you to become more aware of when the critic is running the show and signal to yourself...
3 Steps to Quiet the Critic in Your Head: Step One
After a personal success or win do you tell yourself, “Yeah, but anyone could’ve done that.”? Do the words “couldn’t” and “shouldn’t” intrude on your thoughts? Do you often focus on your flaws or mistakes? Has second-guessing yourself become second nature? These are...
Avoiding Your Avoidance?
Uncomfortable situations. Difficult conversations. Acknowledging a problem. Facing the reality of a bad relationship. Posting a blog on avoidance….. These are all things that people actively avoid. What you avoid can unfortunately define you just as much as the...
Online Therapy: Myth and Reality
Unless you’ve been on another planet for the last few months you’ve probably noticed almost every healthcare provider except dentistry is being handled online at this point. With the surge of coronavirus cases recently it will likely be for some time before in-person...
“How was your day?” 7 Steps to listen and connect with your partner.
“You aren’t listening to me…” Everyone hears this at times in their relationships. I’ve experienced it myself. Becoming a better listener is one of the best places to start improving your relationship. Do you and your partner talk about the day’s events? Let’s use...
4 reasons a man should see a therapist
“Only people who are a real mess go to a therapist.” “Other people will think I’m weak or crazy” “Just talking about things isn’t going to do any good.” “I just need to work harder, pull myself up by my bootstraps.” Even though therapy has become pervasive in...
